Sunday, April 12, 2009

Do you feel this is wrong? Concerning a distant family funeral?

I have known my wife for 16 years. Recently a cousin of hers died. I have never met this person, even though she only lived about 5 miles from our home. My wife went to visit her everyday the last few weeks at the hospital. The father of the cousin that died asked my wife to ask me to be a pallbearer at the funeral. I have no plans to go to the funeral because I don%26#039;t know this person, and I certainly don%26#039;t feel comfortable being a pallbearer for someone that I don%26#039;t know. I just went to the funeral home to pay my respects and stayed about a half hour. We also had flowers sent to the funeral home. I told my wife that I don%26#039;t feel comfortable being a pallbearer at a funeral for someone that I never met, and that they should find family members that she knew to do that job. Am I being unreasonable?

Do you feel this is wrong? Concerning a distant family funeral?
no i don%26#039;t think you are, at least you attended the funeral....
Reply:yes, you should be there, it%26#039;s support.
Reply:Listen, if your wife is going to the funeral, you%26#039;re going to the funeral. You%26#039;re married, get it? You gotta support each other and sometimes that means doing things you don%26#039;t wanna. Someday she%26#039;ll do something she doesn%26#039;t want to do, just for you. The family prolly asked u to be a pallbearer because they don%26#039;t have anyone else- no offense. So suck it up and carry the casket and bring some kleenex for your wife and her family.
Reply:Not unreasonable at all...


there should be no reason for you to have that responsibility when you didnt know the person who died and had no contact with them while they were still alive.
Reply:If your not comfortable with being a pallbearer you shouldn%26#039;t be forced to do it even if you had known the person.



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